Kylie May

Kylie May

Layla Faith

Layla Faith

Zoey Noelle

Zoey Noelle


Our baby boy, due March 16th.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Blessings Through Raindrops

Bryan and I moved to Stevens point in the fall of 2003. Even before we dated or married, we made several trips 'home' to Green Bay over the years. Every single time we drove back to Stevens Point, it rained. I cannot remember one time, when it did not rain, drizzle, pour, snow, sleet or something on the drive back to Point. We would even have conversations in the car about what it might 'mean'. 

I am an optomist. I looked at it as refreshing. Going back to work or "the real world" after being on vacation in Green Bay. A new beginning almost. I won't speak for Bryan. I honestly don't remember what he thought of it. He's not a negative person, but he worries more about everything. Can you blame him, with all he's been through? 

So, why am I telling you this? Because, I've come to realize that blessings can come through raindrops. Yes, I stole the idea from this song. But, it is ringing so true in my life right now. (Even more beautiful when it's sung.)

Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights 
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise
"Blessings" by Laura Story

Our world has been turned upside down in the last two weeks. We had our 18 week ultrasound, two weeks ago, to find out the gender. They found abnormalities, and a few things to be concerned about. Never something you want to hear. Long story, very short, we had an appointment with a specialist the next day. We found out a lot about the baby, but nothing definite. They did many tests for everything. All of the tests came back negative. 

Through those two weeks, we had more than enough things to think about. We found out it's a girl. Her name is Layla Faith. Also, the Dr. kept telling us that termination of the pregnancy is an option. Not for us. Layla is a baby, no matter what science may say. God created her in His perfect image. She is perfect to Him. 

Fast forward to yesterday. Our 20 week appointment with a different specialist. They did an ultrasound again & then we met with the Dr. I'll steal a friend's words & say it was a grim reaper meeting. Nothing positive. He gave us a diagnosis, but nothing that can be proven by a test. It is what will have to do for now. 

Layla's arms and legs are short. That is not life threatening. She can live with that. However, her chest cavity is too small. Her heart is smooshed and there is not enough room for her lungs to grow. There is fluid that can't cycle through because everything is so crammed, which is causing swelling around her head. 

One third of the babies, with this diagnosis, heart's stop beating in the womb. One third are delivered pre-term. One third are born, and live for one hour, at the most. This is what we were told. I will go in every week, to listen to the heartbeat, to make sure Layla's heart is still beating. I will go in every 3 weeks to have an ultrasound with the specialist. At 26 weeks, we will have an appointment with the Neonatal Unit, to discuss our birth plan. 

None of this sounds fun to me. BUT, I'm keeping my head up. I'm not going to let this get me down. I have to have faith that things can change. Bad circumstances are an opportunity for God to do miracles. The pastor at our church has been doing a series on Faith. Well, I have to hear it about 10 times for my job. I don't think that's a coincidence. Hope is tomorrow. Faith is today. 

I don't think I can say this enough. THANK YOU! We have received so much support in prayer and encouraging notes on Facebook. It means a lot to us, to know that you are thinking of us and praying for us & Layla. 

Prayer requests:
-Layla's chest cavity to grow
-My brain to shut off so I can sleep (why can't women have a nothing box? not fair)
-Positive thinking, having faith

I know this is crazy long. Sorry. This whole blog will not just be about Layla. It will help with communicating the same thing to everyone, but I will also post about the rest of our life too :)

P.S. This gives us a whole new perspective. We are so blessed to have Kylie May. It's been easy to spoil her & hard to discipline her lately. 


Emily Anna said...

Oh Nanc-a-bell,

We love you guys so much. I am so proud of your attitude. It's not an easy situation to be in. But remember, GOD CAN! No if ands or buts. We will keep you, your family and little Layla in our prayers.

Beautiful name by the way.


Lindsey said...

Thanks for sharing your blog! My biggest piece of advice is to keep doing what you are doing. No matter what, you have to go with your instincts and things will turn out how they are supposed to. The medical world is far from perfect, but is definitely confusing. I can relate, so if you need anybody to vent to I am only a phone call away! Thinking positively for you all! Keep fighting Layla Faith, you have a wonderful family cheering you on!

The Cupcake Tower said...

Love from Colorado...we'll be praying for you.
Travis, Joy and the kids

Kirsty said...

Thanks for sharing this Nancy. I didn't know much about what you were all going through. Will be praying and praying and praying. Much love!

JAGgirl said...

Lots of prayers and Faith Nancy! Always here for you all. Great idea to start the blog.
Love you!

Donica said...

Thank you for sharing! Prayers for healing and peace for all your family will continue! Keep the Faith!

Jill Raisleger said...

So glad you created this blog. I think about you guys all the time and wonder how you are. Now we are strong and your faith is beautiful. God is and amazing God and He alone can do miracles. Your attitude and perspecitive alone are miracles to me! Love you guys!

Mary said...

Trusting in the Lord that all of this is for a reason, one we may never understand. Loving your strength through it all and that you are not allowing this to control or consume your daily lives. You are all so very precious to us and we love you, and will continue to have Faith that everything will be in His time and at His will.

mom G.

Rabelers said...

Such a beautiful name and a beautiful girl that you are carrying. Sending love and prayers your way from Texas. :)