It is becoming more obvious that I am pregnant, so I'm getting more & more people asking when I'm due, what I'm having, etc. I don't mind talking about Layla, but I've had time to process this & it always comes as a shock to people.
One person I told on Sunday replied with, "What an honor.". Hmmmm. My gut reaction was, "Really? An honor to carry a baby that will not survive? That's daring to say." But, he explained. What an honor it is, that God would choose me to carry Layla. For some reason, He trusted me to carry her and love her no matter what is going on. He believed in me, that I would not end the pregnancy when given the option, that my family would be able to pull through this challenge and find the good in this situation. What a different way to think about this.
Sticking her tongue out and making a silly face, another woman said, "Tell the Devil to bring it on. You will not bow, you will not break. Satan only tests men of faith." (James 1)
My last comment is a "Thank You". We had a rough weekend. At first I thought, I don't need to complain on the blog. Then, I decided to be real and tell you all that I was having a hard time. Thank you for your encouragement, saying it's okay to have a bad day, and for praying. One of my friends posted this on her
blog. God gave me each of you to help carry my burdens and remain steady. Thank you!
P.S. I'm super excited for this weekend. Matt & Crim are coming for our annual pumpkin patch trip!!
1 comment:
Nancy & Bryan....
I just sat and read all of your blogs back to September. I don't know how else to explain what I am feeling right now except emotional. I was thrown into a world of emotions when our little girl came 2 months early and spent 23 days in the NICU. I was not prepared for the emotions and roller coaster ride my faith was about to take. I boo hoo'd for our situations at time and felt the "this isn't fair God" emotions....but in the end it did nothing but make me a stronger person, better mother, and deepen my faith. I am sincerly touhed by the strong faith God has placed in you and your family. I know the one thing I can do for you is pray. Pray strong, pray hard, and pray lovingly. I intned to pass yoru story on to those I know to keep the chain of prayer going for you.
With all my love, Carmen Polomis (friend of Bryan)
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